Q & A from emails sent to us about positions, pleasure and performance!

Woman on top sex positions

Q & A from emails sent to us about positions, pleasure and performance!

Question: A young woman emailed us to ask how you can get maximum pleasure from woman on top sex.

Answer: There are some general rules during sex which help to make it much more pleasurable for you both - first is to consider what your partner needs and wants. That's not to say you should put your partner before yourself, but certainly make sure you consider what they want. So, for example, if you're trying out woman on top sex, and you're the woman, don't just lunge up and down on his penis without checking with him if he'd prefer a slower, more gentle movement! The speed of sex is under your control, sure, and you can always move faster if you want to, since this might be what you need to get off, but only do that with his agreement. You know how it feels when a man pounds hard into you when he's on top - that can be exciting, sure, but only if you're in the mood for it - and it's right to extend the same consideration to your partner when the positions are reversed during sex.

Then again, you might also want to consider how you move during sex. We all think of thrusting, with the man stroking his penis in and out of the vagina until one or both of you comes - but there's plenty of other ways you can move. For example, you can rotate your hips in a kind of circular motion while his penis is inside your vagina. This not only gives him a quite different set of sensations, it also stimulates more of your vagina. But find out what you both prefer - some couples like it more if they stick to the up and down movement!

The man is pretty much in the position that his partner's in during man on top sex - that is, his movement's limited. But he can move more than you might think - for example, he can move you by placing his hands on your pelvis, on your hips, or around your waist. This isn't a case of him shifting you about - it's more about him gently encouraging you in which way to go and how to move. He can show you how to move in the ways that are best for him, and you can show him what's best for you. In short, this might be summed up as: do what feels good for you both! You certainly want to try having the woman on top leaning forwards or backwards at different angles to see how it feels for you both, and have her lean right back to check out where it feels best.

If you have the man so he's semi-sitting up, semi-lying, with his back resting against something, then he can support his partner's weight as she leans forward onto him - this gives her more chance of pressing her clitoris on his body and perhaps reaching orgasm while making love.

Variation, as with so much else, is important, and instead of just sticking to one movement, say riding up and down his shaft, try alternating this by moving your pelvis around in a circle. As you do this, have your man push up his pelvis and move his knees up so he can get deeper into you.

Finally, the reverse cowgirl is always fun to try! You can see a picture of this higher up the page - it refers to when the woman is facing away from her man.